Divorce is one of the most difficult and painful experiences you have ever had. You are saddened by the loss of your marriage, you feel that you have failed in your role as husband or wife, and you may harbor bitterness and resentment toward your ex-spouse. Silver inserts that you have the opportunity to reorganize your life, but unfortunately, you will have to work behind the scenes before you can move forward successfully.
Grief, Guilt, Acceptance and Progress
Acknowledge your feelings of sadness and guilt. Relationship expert Dr Tammy Nelson writes, “You may have a feeling that marriage will work better than ever. Now you will have to grieve for that. ”You may also feel a measure of remorse, and it is only natural to wonder where things are going wrong. Divorce coach Dr. Karen Finn recommends that you review the information you receive during this transition period and use it as a response to help you determine what works and what doesn’t in the relationship so you can better prepare for the future.
Talk to someone. Working on your feelings after a divorce can be devastating and painful, and it is best not to try to deal with it alone. You will need a strong support system to deal with this. It is very helpful if you can rely on friends or family, but you may encounter problems that you are not comfortable talking about with people close to you. If so, you may want to consider seeing a therapist or psychologist who can help you cope with this difficult time.
Forgiving your ex-spouse is an important step in the treatment process, but it is not always easy. Author and pardon specialist Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D. he says forgiveness is a gathering of people that includes manifestations of repentance and a desire to make amends. Adoption, on the other hand, is something you can do to help yourself and heal. You suggest giving up the desire for revenge, letting go of your anxiety over the pain you have felt, and forgiving yourself for your part. Most importantly, he recommends that you “get your life back on track.”
Start rebuilding with life by taking the child’s steps in building the life you want to live. Reconnect with your ex-spouse, and get to know the person you are. Have fun with it. Explore your interests, make a hobby, make new friends, or try a new look. This is your time to discover who you are and what you want out of life.